


The time after "The King is dead"

by Dollaphead



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: F/M, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Love, M/M, Magic Revealed, Post-Canon, Season/Series 06
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-02
Updated: 2020-08-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:01:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,732
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25678516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dollaphead/pseuds/Dollaphead
Summary: It's basically a season 6 of Merlin and pretty much Canon. The only thing which is different is, that Arthur's last words weren't "Thank you", they were "I love you".  It follows Merlin's thoughts about it and the future of Camelot under Gwen's rule.It's a Merthur and Arwen fic, depends on your opinion.
Relationships: Gwen & Merlin (Merlin), Gwen/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Merlin & Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Kudos: 3





	1. The king's death

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first Merlin fanfiction and my first fiction in English.   
> A friend of me corrected it for me.   
>  Please tell me if you like it or not

"I...I...love...you", he stuttered. Nearly too weak to speak.

Merlin thought he was going to save him. But he didn't. He didn't make it in time. He was too slow. He should have called Kilgharrah sooner. But he didn't even know whether he was still able to fly or not. But he Could. They could have made it. But It was all his fault. And now he didn't even understand Arthur's last sentence. What did he mean? Like a boyfriend and husband, or just like a close friend and soulmate? He couldn't tell. He couldn't even tell what he thought was better. He loved Arthur, still does. But in which way? Was it even possible to love a man? He heard about it. The Roman’s talked about that when they were the ruler of this land a long time ago and some people still remember their stories. But Merlin wasn't sure whether they were just stories and legends or true. And by the way what was with Gwen? Arthur was her husband. They loved each other. But you can’t like two people? Like you love both your parents? What did Arthur mean with his last sentence? By god's sake why had the last thing this clotpole have to say be such a great mystery! And why couldn't he have told Merlin sooner?! And explain all this. What was he going to do now? Change his life? Tell everybody? No. Camelot lost its king and was weak. Gwen needed Merlin. He couldn’t come home like that: "Hi Gwen, your husband is dead and probably loved me instead of you. But don't worry I'll be there for you." That certainly wouldn't help anybody. Arthur was dead. That was the truth. And he should have helped and supported Gwen and not destroy half her life for what? Nothing. Whatever Arthur meant, he trusted Gwen with the kingdom. Not Merlin. And he loved her, maybe not like she did him. Maybe he loved Merlin more. But that doesn't matter. Arthur was away and talking about how his last words wouldn’t have helped anybody. They would only make it worse. And not only for Gwen, also for the rest of the kingdom. A kingdom already weakened. No. Merlin wouldn’t tell anybody about this, not even Gaius.  
The moment the young warlock decided this he arrived at the gates of Camelot. Soon everything will be different. Now everyone was happy, they've won. And not only the battle. They have won the whole war. But they also lost. They lost the most important person in this war. Their saver, their hero, their king. And soon everybody will know. The only thing left was their queen. A great one, but this kingdom had no heir. No future. The kingdom was more weakened than ever before. And this time it was alone. No great king, no hero and no saver. Only a queen without an heir. A queen which at this point didn't even know the tragedy of her destiny. And Merlin was the lucky one to tell her. And the worst: He had no idea how. All the way the only thing he could think about was Arthur's "I love you". A really important sentence. One you normally don't tell your friend. But that had to wait. The important thing was: How to tell Gwen that Arthur's dead? Does he Just go and tell her straight away? Or slowly? Sitting, standing, lying? What will he do when she starts crying and will she be mad at him, because he didn't save her husband? What if she wants to see the king's body?  
There was so much in the head of the young man, he didn't even realise, that he already stoods right before the gates of the palace. Soon the whole castle would know that Merlin was here. And he will destroy all their hopes and so many dreams and lives. In a few moments all the joy and happiness will be gone and the only thing left will be sadness, fear and maybe even anger.  
He took all his courage together and walked down the hall to Gwen's chambers. When Merlin arrived, he stopped and took a deep breath. Then he knocked on the door. "Come in", he heard Gwen's voice from the inside. Merlin carefully opened the door and stepped slowly in the room. He looked around and he was close to crying again. Everything around him made it seem like Arthur was still alive.Everything was the same. It seemed like he would come in ant instant and shout at Merlin. But that will never happen again. Gwen turned around. The moment she met Merlin’s face, hers immediately switched sad. Of course it did, Merlin returned alone, without Arthur. It was clear.  
The king is dead. That was it. One simple sentence. But it changed everything. It was in every mind. And not only would it be on the minds of people of Camelot, no. It was in the minds of the people of all five kingdoms. Because this king was different. Arthur not only cared for himself, nor only for his nobles. He cared for everyone. For everyone who needed help. And he helped everyone, Arthur didn't care if they were poor or rich, if noble or not. He didn't even care which kingdom they were from. If they needed help, he helped. But now this great king was gone. He died so young. So suddenly. But most important: Without an heir. The future of the kingdom was gone. The people of Camelot were frightened. Yes, they had a queen. But what will happen after she dies? Who will become king or queen after her? What will happen to the people? All this was in their minds. And the sentence was always there. You could nearly feel his presence. The king is dead. Long live the queen. Everyone knew it. Every man, every woman and every child. This sentence was in the whole kingdom. And in every conversation. It changed the lives of the people of Camelot forever.  
While all that happened the queen sat at her desk and tried to plan the future of her kingdom. Sometimes alone, but most of the time with Leon, Percival or Merlin. They tried to help her, but in the end it was her decision, hers alone. The most important thing now was to calm down the people. But no one had an idea how. The easiest thing would be marriage. But Gwen wasn't ready for that. And they all understood her.  
"Maybe I should think about it again", she said quietly. "You don't have to Gwen. You should take your time", Merlin answered. He couldn’t look her in the eyes. Ever Since Arthur's last words, Merlin felt guilty in some way. He wasn't even sure why. Maybe because he loved Arthur? Because he hoped Arthur loved him more than Gwen? "Merlin? What's the matter with you? Since you've been back you can’t look at me. Is it because I didn’t do anything because of your magic?" Gwen asked. "No, no it's difficult", Merlin responded. "You can always talk to me Merlin. You know that right?", Gwen said and looked at him. "Yes, of course I know. And I also know that you will do everything in your power to help me and my kind. Just like Arthur would have done.” Merlin spoke as Gwen nodded. "I promise I will and I won't rest until it's done. But I'm afraid that we can't do it right now. We have to take it slowly", Gwen said. "There are more important things now", Merlin answered and looked for the first time in days into her eyes. "And we will do them. Together" Gwen said softly.

"Ok, so with what should we start?", Merlin asked, desperate to change the subject. "First we will make a funeral ceremony for all the victims of the battle. So everyone can say goodbye to their friends. I think that's more personal than only for a king half of them never really met", Gwen suggested. "I think that's a good idea, Arthur would have done something similar, I think.” Merlin said. "So we have to start preparing. I would do it in the court. So everyone who wants to come can. And we have to announce it soon enough, so also the people from far away can participate", Gwen decided. Merlin nodded as an answer.  
They continued and talked about other things important for the funeral ceremony. In the end they decided to announce it tomorrow and make it in two weeks. They will make a fire as memory and sign for all who died. They planned to offer everyone at least a bit of food for free.  
"I'll go and see if I can help Gaius with the wounded", Merlin told the queen before walking out of her chamber’s.

"How are they?” the queen wanted to know. "Gaius thinks they'll survive. But to know it for sure we have to wait", Merlin explained. "Tell me when something changes, good or bad", Guinevere order. "I will. I promise", Merlin swore. 

"Gaius?", Merlin called out when he entered the room where all the men lied, who were wounded in the great battle of Camlann. "Oh Merlin. How was your meeting with the Queen", Gaius asked. "Good, but it wasn't a real meeting. How are the men?" "Everything's the same as yesterday", Gaius said. "Can I help with something?", Merlin wanted to know. "No, not yet. I just finished everything. Go get some rest. You sleep way too less since Arthur's death", Gaius ordered. "I don't think I can sleep. Everytime I close my eyes, the only thing I can see is Arthur's dead face" and hear his "I love you" Merlin added in his mind. "It's important to sleep Merlin. Really go and get some rest", Gaius explained. Merlin nodded silent and went to his and Gaius’ room.  
He went straight to his bed and laid down. But the moment he closed his eyes, Arthur's face appeared. And he heard his "I love you" like an echo. The young warlock immediately opened his eyes and stood up again. Everytime he laid down to sleep this happened. The day Arthur died Merlin stopped sleeping. When Arthur died on this field, a part of Merlin died with him. A part went with his friend to Avalon. This part stayed there and will always stay there until the day Arthur rises again. Merlin knew he would never be the same again. He will never be this happy servant again. The boy who went hunting and laughed with the knights. A carefree boy, who had no idea of the true cruels of life.  
Oh how much he missed this unaware young boy. The one who loved and enjoyed life. The child who thought all will end well. That he will save everyone and will harm no one. But he tries to save others and killed his best friend in the end. He killed him. He could have saved him. Called the dragon sooner. He could of killed Mordred when he first met him or Morgana by all the chances he had. If he had listened to Gaius and didn't free Aithusa, Arthur maybe as well would still be alive. When he thought about it he did everything wrong a human can do wrong. And he will never forgive himself for that. That was the only sure thing.  
"Merlin have you slept", Gaius asked. "Yes", Merlin lied as he responded. "I have to go." Merlin said and quickly went out the room. He closed the door behind him and went down the hallways. Shortly before he reached the courtyard he walked into Percival. "Merlin, are you alright? You look terrible", the knight asked. "Yes, yes. I'm fine", Merlin mumbled. "I understand you Merlin. I miss Gwaine too", Percival said. "Oh, sorry I forget to look after you. I miss Gwaine too", Merlin said honestly. "I know. And I know that you and me aren't fine.” Percival answered. Merlin nodded in response. "It's just easier to lie than talking over it.” Percival added. "Yes, you and Gwaine were so close too.” Merlin agreed. "I have to go now, sorry. But thank you Percival." The knight nodded understanding and walked deeper into the castle.  
Merlin continued his walk and went into the forest. He walked through it and came to the clearing. When he arrived there the druids were already there. "Emrys", one of them greeted him. "It's good to see you, Amergin.” Merlin answered. "Have you talked to the queen about the legalization of magic?” The chief of the druids asked Merlin. "There are other important things to do first. I'm sorry", Merlin said sadly. "We understand. She lost her husband and a lot of knights. And she needs the faith of her people. But please make sure no one has to die just because you have magic", Amergin wanted. "That won't happen I promise. And I promise that the golden age will arrive soon. Maybe not like we thought it would. Not with the greatest king but instead with the greatest queen", Merlin promised the druids before he went back to the castle.


	2. The new era

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So finally I finished my second chapter. It's Gwen's POV and I know most people don't like her. But live with it, I couldn't write it different. Next will be Merlin again, I promise.  
> I hope you'll like it.

2 weeks later/ The funeral ceremony  
"Everything's ready?", Gwen asked her first knight. "Yes, my lady", Leon responded. "Good, good", Gwen mumbled in thoughts. "You're ready, too?", Merlin wanted to know. "As ready as you can, I suppose." "Then let's go", Percival said. 

"I know that I'm not the only person who lost someone I loved. And I understand that some of you don't understand why they lost their husband, father or son. They died in a battle. But not one for honor or wealth. They died for freedom and justice. They fought not for their king. They fought for you. And they died with honor. They sacrificed themselves for everyone in this land. And their sacrifices were all the same important. No one died with more honor or was more important than another. We all lost someone, but we have to remember that they died for us. That we have to carry on. They died for a new time. And we will begin this time soon. But now let's say goodbye to them and give them the honor and respect they deserved", Gwen ended her speech. All were silent during it. Everyone showed respect and after it they all nodded to show that they agreed.   
After her speech Gwen joined the others in the jard. She talked to many people. When she talked to them, she started realising how many men they really lost. Most of the time she only thought of Arthur and forgot that he wasn't the only one who died. That she wasn't the only one who lost the most important person in her life.   
The funeral ceremony ended when the sun started rising the next day. The big fire went out and all went home. It seemed like the feast helped the people to say goodbye and carry on, but Gwen wasn't sure if that only were imagination. "My lady?", Leon asked for her attention. "Yes, I think we should go all inside and sleep a bit", Gwen suggested tiredly. The others just nodded and went inside. Everyone but Merlin. He stood in a corner in the back. If Gwen remembered right he stood there the whole time. He changed since Arthur's death. She knew how close they were. Sometimes she even thought they were even closer than she and Arthur. "Merlin? Are you alright?", she asked quietly. "Mmmmm?" Gwen took a deep breath, he looked terrible. "When have you slept the last time?", she asked her friend. "Don't remember exactly", he said quietly. "Merlin, Arthur wouldn't want that for you", Gwen said to him. "Maybe, but it's not that easy. And you should know that", Merlin answered angry. "I'm sorry Merlin. But I don't want to see you again, before you slept. Is that understood?", Gwen ordered. "Yes my lady", Merlin said and looked at his feet. "Okay, then I hope I'll see you soon", Gwen said and went into the castle like the others. When she looked back and saw how Merlin followed her slowly. 

The next day she didn't see Merlin until late afternoon. "Morning", he greeted her smiling. And for the first time since he returned from Avalon it seemed truly. "It is late after morning, Merlin", she smiled, "Why are you so happy?" "Nothing. It's nothing", he answered, still smiling. "Come on, tell me", she begged. "You will know soon enough", he said grinning and kept going. Gwen shook her head and went to the council room. She took a deep breath and walked in.   
The council meeting wasn't as bad as she expected. They talked about the usual stuff and in the end the majority was on her side.   
She decided to walk a bit through the low town, looking how the people were.   
"Leon would you like to come with me in the low town. I want to see how they are", she asked her first knight. "Of course, my lady", the loyal man responded. 

When they arrived in the low town Gwen noticed that there were very less people. Most of them were still at home, exhausted from the long funeral ceremony.   
The few Gwen met were very friendly. Most of them thanked her for yesterday. A few lauded her speech. Others showed their pity for the loss of her husband. They all loved him. His way to rule. And Gwen promised them she would continue this way. 

"I think the ceremony was good for them", Gwen said, when they were back in the castle. "Yes, it definitely was", Leon agreed. "We should do it every year. As memory to all who died in our greatest battle", Gwen decided. "And especially for the death of our greatest king", Leon added. Gwen's answer was a simple nod. "How will you call it?", Leon asked. "I don't have a name for it yet", Gwen answered, "I'm a bit tired. I think I will go into my chambers." "You alright?", Leon asked worriedly. "Yes, just tired. I'll see you later", Gwen said. Leon nodded and went to the train ground and the other knights.   
Gwen went to her chambers. Her servant helped her get in her nightdress. 

"Hey Gwen. How are you feeling?", Merlin asked curious. "Fine, why are you asking?", she wanted to know. "Just so, no reason, because you're my friend and I am worried about my friends and", Merlin started talking. "Ok, ok Merlin. I don't suspect you or something like this", Gwen calmed him. "Oh, ok", Merlin smiled. "You're not feeling, I don't know. Any different?", he asked. Gwen first wanted to say that she's fine, but then she thought that wasn't entirely true. "What do you know what I don't?", Gwen asked him. "Nothing", Merlin said defensively, "You said you didn't suspect me or anything." "Yes, but then you turned weird", Gwen said. "I'm always weird", Merlin answered. "Merlin?", Gwen said and went a step closer. "You really want to know?", Merlin asked with his head down on the floor. "Yes", Gwen said. "So it's with my magic there are things I can feel. You understand?", Merlin explained. "Yes" "Ok. I think you're pregnant", Merlin said, studying the ground. "What?!", Gwen shouted. "You're pregnant. You will have a baby, Arthur's baby", Merlin said, still not looking in her eyes. "You're sure?", she wanted to know. Merlin nodded as answer. "Oh, that changes a lot,'' she said, a bit worried. "Don't worry, I will be there for you, help you. You won't have to do this alone. And see it positive. A part of Arthur will live in this child", Merlin explained. "Yes, you're right", Gwen agreed, "But I have to think of all this, alone." "Of, course", Merlin smiled. She smiled back and went back to her chambers.   
This was too much for her. For the kingdom it was the best thing, which could happen. She already worried about its future. And the nobles started to put a big pressure on her, they wanted her to marry again, but she wasn't able. Now this wouldn't matter anymore. When she dies one day, the kingdom will have a next king or queen. And she would have a memory of Arthur always around her. But how to tell anyone and when? And this was only the top of the iceberg. There were so many questions. How to raise a child and manage a kingdom at the same time? Merlin offered her help, but how much could he do? It wasn't his child, he had his own life. And she couldn't expect that he would give all that up for her. 

The next morning she went straight to Gaius' and Merlin's rooms. "Gaius is Merlin here?", She asked the old physician. "Yes, he is in his room. Is everything alright, my lady?", Gaius answered. "Yes, everything is fine. I just want to talk to Merlin", she explained and hurried into his small room.   
The young warlock sat on his bed and read an old book, when she entered. "Merlin?", She asked for his attention. "Oh, morning Gwen", he greeted her with a bright smile. "Can I sit?", She asked. "Of course", Merlin said and pointed on the bed, next to himself. Gwen sat down next to him. Now not longer so sure what to say and more important how to say. "I'm not sure if I am ready for that", she just said. "Don't be silly. Of course you are ready", Merlin answered. "But what if I am not good enough. Or don't have enough time? I mean rule a kingdom and take care of a child at the same time?" "Yes, but you are not alone, never forget that And you're a great person, a great queen and you're great with children. And that's all which counts ok?", he explained to her. "You really think?", the queen wanted to know. "Of course I do. You'll be a great mother. Just as great as you are a queen", Merlin confirmed her. "Thank you, you are a really good friend", she thanked him. "When will you tell the court?", Merlin asked. "I have no idea", Gwen said honestly. When she looked up at Merlin's face. He looked back at her with his ocean blue eyes and his cute, kind smile. And this was all she needed, because in this moment she realised, although Arthur was gone she will never be alone. And that was everything she needed at that moment. Of course she wanted all that with Arthur, but it wasn't the end of the world. She had Merlin, Leon and Percival and they will be there for her. "Thank you Merlin", she whispered. "For what?", he looked confused at her. "Everything. Everything you've done for Arthur, for me, for us together and everything you'll do for me and our baby", she explained to him. "It's nothing", Merlin said quietly. "It is. You risked everything, even your life over and over again for Arthur. You were and still are the best friend anybody can wish for", Gwen finished. "And still he died", Merlin whispered sadly. "That wasn't your fault. I'm sure you did everything you could", Gwen said. Merlin only looked sad, even sadder than she. He didn't even look at her. He only studied the floor before him.   
"Sorry, but I have to go. There's an important council meeting", she excused herself. "No problem", Merlin mumbled at the floor. "I go then, see you later", she said and went to the council rooms.

The council meeting wasn't special. A few bandits were seen in the forest, but the knights already took care of it. There were one or two other little points to discuss, but nothing special. And Gwen was very thankful for that. She already had enough to worry.  
I will look after Merlin. He looked very miserable when I left him, she decided then. 

"Merlin?", she asked the warlock when she entered his room. "Mmmmm?", was the only reaction he gave her.   
Merlin sat there in the same miserable way when she had left. "What's the matter?", she asked worried. "I'm fine", he answered with his best fake smile. "No, it's certainly not", she argued. "I miss him", he mumbled on the ground, like a little child. "We all do", she said, putting an arm around him, to pull the warlock into a hug. And you maybe the most, she added in her thoughts. The first moment he crapped himself, but after a moment he relaxed slowly. After a few more moments she pulled away and looked into his face. "I'm there for you, like you always were for me." "Thank you", he whispered and smiled at her. "We're family ok? And you will never be alone. We will go through this together", she confirmed him. "We are", Merlin nodded. 

Two months have passed since this day. Today Gwen would finally make her pregnancy official. She already told Leon, Percival, her main servant Leila and her ladies in waiting. But today she would tell it the whole court. And not only them, the whole kingdom. And the more she thought about it, the more nervous she got. She took a deep breath and looked back at Merlin. He had a big smile on his face and nodded when she looked at him. Slowly she went on the balcony. In the yard the people were already waiting. All looked up at her with curiosity. The whole courtyard was full of people. Farmers, nobles, knights and more.   
When she thought about this moment, Arthur always stands next to her. Her beloved husband, with a proud smile on his face. He announced that the queen was with child. And she stood there. Proud, with her smaller hand in his.   
But sadly that was a dream. Just a dream. Now she stood there. Without a proud smile, she was still too sad for smiling. Instead of her husband her first knight next to her.   
"I summoned you all together for an important announcement", she started. The faces turned serious, when they heard her words. "But after we lost so much. And had so many bad news, I finally have good ones", she continued. Everyone was silent and was listening to her. Just say it, you can do it, she said to herself. "Camelot may lost his king, but its future is safe now. Because in half a year it will have a new prince or princess", she told them. The first moment it was silent, a scary silent. But then the people understood. They understood that their king gave them one last gift. He gave them a future. And the moment the people started realising that, they shouted congratulations and cheered for happiness. They thought their future was doomed, but now the hope was back. The happiness.   
When Gwen turned back to look at Merlin, he cried. For happiness for her and the kingdom. But also because his best friend wasn't there to see it. Because her husband wasn't there to tell the people the good news. To walk proud through the hallways and tell everyone again and again. Because his friend won't be there to see his child and held it in his arms. When their eyes met she gave him a warm smile. He gave her a wet smile in return, but it didn't reached his eyes. His blue eyes were so full of sadness and hurt that she also started crying. 

And so they stood there. The people Arthur loved the most Merlin and Guinevere. Both crying and remembering their only true love. But still remembering the life which grows in Gwen's stomach. A part of Arthur which will survive in it boy or girl, king or queen. A reason to live, for both of them.   
Gwen felt how Merlin slowly stepped closer to her. Carefully he reached out for her hand. She put it into his. Then they slowly turned around and went back in. Letting the cheering happy crowd behind the castle walls.   
Now they weren't ready to be happy like them, but both felt, that one day they will be happy again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A thanks to @kingclotpole for correcting my language mistakes (also in the first chapter).


End file.
